When it comes to loving ourselves, we’re all a work in progress. From the start of our formative years we’ve been taught to read, write, theorize, calculate and analyze life. To say “please” and “thank you”, to be kind to others and to put their needs before our own. While these are truly noble attributes there was one glaring absence in the things we were taught: Self love. After all, how can an empty glass quench the thirst of others? Self love may be in fact one of the most selfless things we can do. It allows us to shine our light on others.
To clarify, self love isn’t about staying up till late and eating an entire box of chocolates or staying up till the morning finishing up episodes to your favorite show. Though there’s nothing wrong with these things on occasion, self love is about prioritizing your happiness and wellbeing from taking actions that support your physical, psychological and spiritual growth. It is about having a high regard for your own well being and happiness and not at the expense of others needs. How do we accomplish this, you ask? Here are five ways we’ve found out helpful-
Remember that Physical Health is a Treasure
If you’re healthy you’re truly rich. It is true that only when we suffer through some physical ailment are we reminded that our health is all we have. Giving importance to our physical health should be a daily occurrence rather than an occurrence once we experience suffering, pain or illness. Our bodies are a home for our mind and should be treated with respect for the job it does for us every single day.
While eating well, sleeping well, exercising, meditating and getting regular physical check ups are of paramount importance, there are still more things you can do to fully acknowledge the power of your body. At the end of each day thank your body for doing such a great job. After all, there is no you without your physique.
Accept your Past
We all come with our share of baggage, experiences, regrets, traumas and most likely a lot of mistakes we’ve made along the way (Nobody is perfect and how else would we learn?). Self love is accepting who you were earlier as a person and what you had to go through to be where you are today. The truth, however harsh it may seem, is that each dark moment in your life carries with it an important lesson and those lessons made you, you. All ruminating about the past ever does is make it impossible to enjoy the present moment happening around you. And since the future is shaped by what we do in the present moment it also prevents us from making the future as good as it can be.
Make a List of Mood Shifters
There will invariably be days where you will feel down due to some circumstance that you may not have control of. Life does happen to all of us sometimes and it’s okay to feel those emotions from time to time, that’s what part of being human is. But it’s also important to not dwell on those situations that can bring us down because it is so easy to let two bad minutes domino into feeling bad the entire day. Which is why we should make a list of mood shifters.
Mood shifters could be anything that could change your feelings in a snap. It might be beautiful memories, future bucket list events, funny moments, nature, the people you love or anything that makes you cherish your time on earth. Once you have a list of these mood shifters you can easily reference this list whenever you find yourself angry, frustrated or deflated. Focus on one of these items and see your mood change.
Choose People Deliberately
We’ve all heard the old adage “You are the sum of the five people you most spend time with”. In this instance self love is all about choosing the best support system for yourself. It is also about setting healthy boundaries and only letting people in who want what's best for you. Your intuition is the best judge to determine if a boundary has been crossed or not. So build your life with friends, find mentors who will challenge you to rise up and don’t be afraid to cut ties with those with less than honorable intentions. Since we spend most of our time with these people you deserve nothing but kindness and appreciation from them.
Welcome Change
As it has been said, change is the only constant we have. It is truly one of the rare things that affects us all. Life is inevitably a series of changes and self love means accepting the changes that come along with it. Yes, the levels of changes we face vary in difficulty but we’re all in the same boat - we ALL have to face changes at some point in our lives. Accepting changes as a part of the journey allows us to see them as normal, unavoidable parts of our lives and thereby allows us to approach them objectively. Our defeats, heartbreaks and misgivings are all a part of the journey towards a better/different version of you. Think of this as an upgrade to a higher version of yourself.
1 comment
Very useful.